I recently took two days off from caffeine. In the calmness that I felt as a result, I could see how caffeine had been impacting my mind. Caffeine forces me to stay in action and never rest. This prevents my meditation from being fully effective, limits my sleep, and reduces my ability to recover from injury or fully feel my body.
Caffeine puts a layer of dishonesty on my experience. It makes me less happy. I feel a rush and a need to achieve that makes me overlook the moment. It seems that without caffeine, I’m more able to stay in the moment, and more attuned to it, and willing to listen and having the freedom to do and not do things, as opposed to being driven by a chemical impulse in my body.
With caffeine there is a “do something, anything” kind of push in my experience, which removes the possibility of doing nothing and therefore everything that I do is that much less of a choice. I hate feeling trapped, like I’m not in control.
Caffeine has me moving from experience to experience, with the times between the experiences being considered as wasted. Meditation encourages and strengthens the experience of feeling every moment and the ability to stick with a plan and not deviate. I prefer the latter.
I’m switching to one cup per day.